i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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