ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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