My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
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