actually, I'm a sock model
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
