I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I just want nice things and good sex
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
