Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
