i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
