Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
