everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
