Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
