And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize
