that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
