WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
