Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize