is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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