i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
