so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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