yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
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