Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
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