He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
