girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
being pregnant is like rehab
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
