should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
