I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
