i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
she pinky promised me she was 18
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
