Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
