fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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