Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
