Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
