Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
