Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
