Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Randomize
