my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
