don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
