You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Congratulations! We have a period
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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