I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
