Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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