I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
