Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
