Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Randomize
