would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
