Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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