It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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