did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
