??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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