you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
