dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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