I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
