Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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