Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Randomize
