So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
